He followed me everywhere. Not like a stalker…more like a lost and very loud puppy. I would find him outside my business. Every time I moved, he would move nearby. once even next door. He would always hit the line at the store at the same time I was ready to check out. We were forever “accidentally” meeting up. Even during my married years…he would walk along behind me and say silly things..and I would tell him to leave me alone…that I was a Christian and happily married. He was wasting his time. But it seems he had a lot of time to waste. He would yell after me, “your husband is not who you thinks he is!” and I would yell back “You do not know my husband.” He would looked concerned and say…”No, you do not know your husband!” I should have listened.
My husband was gay. There was no fixing that. He has married two other women since leaving me..because it is tough to be a black lay pastor and be gay…so he would rather have a wife he hates and abuses. I am thankful that I am no longer that woman.
So…what to do about my shadow? One day, after my husband left…we “accidentally ended up walking on the same sidewalk. I was not in the mood for his nonsense and told him I did not want to talk. So…we just walked.
He began to sing..”Hey little goldfish…where ya going to…hey little goldfish. can I swim along with you?…Hey little gold fish…we could have a whale of a time.” I turned around and looked at him. I thought I was the only person in the world who knew that song. It was from some cheesy late night television movie in the 70’s. Some guy had created an experimental house under the sea and his teenagers had their band down there. performing that song.
There Greg was…all beautiful and ridiculous and hopelessly devoted to me…and following me singing…THAT SONG!
“Hey little goldfish…where ya going to…”
I slowed down to walk beside him…and put my hand in his. He tried not to act surprised and we walked along singing softly together.
We have been holding hands ever since.
We traded rings with fish on them at our wedding years later.
Happy Anniversary Beloved